Living in Turbulent Times

A metaphor for our times:

There is a ton of this stuff available to us out “there” in the collective right now – everyone at some level is lifting the lid on their patience levels and letting it rip at whomever and whatever touches the latest trigger.

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Storm Clouds Brewing

Turbulence, we all experience it when flying. From smooth to suddenly  bumpy, unsettled air, and pockets of ups and downs, and the captain warns us, we’re into it, take your seats, and put your seatbelt on, we’re going into rough air.

We bounce and jar our way through it, coming out the other side somewhat stressed, anxious, “is that coming back again”?

We observe others who spilled drinks, are rushing for the bathroom, and feel panicked and anxious for them too. The attendants are trying to calm everyone, like our own inner resources are trying to flood the system with feel good chemicals to help take down the adrenaline response that has just flooded through the system.

It takes about 40-45 minutes to bring it around, and then resume somewhat normal, however, altered enough from the encounter to feel wary of the next encounter.

The brain stores the memory loops so when something similar happens again, the triggers are ready to fire off and they often are firing off, just in anticipation of the upcoming turbulence.

The media reports the daily chaos, reaching for headlines it’s winds the listening public up to a frenzy of turbulent emotions, fearing the next moment is truly going to trigger the end of life as we know it.

Anxiety is rife in the consciousness, and what can anyone do about this?

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Reflections

We all know that when turbulence is encountered in air travel, often the pilot advises, “there’s jet stream here, just above us and I’m going to move us into it, where the ride is going to smooth out so you can all relax and enjoy the flight”

Just like that, things smooth out, and in addition to smoothing out, everyone knows the jet stream, takes less fuel, and you can move much faster on fewer resources. Often you arrive at your destination earlier too.

The jet stream. Easier flow, no turbulence, everyone is calm, rested on arrival and using much less fuel too.

Where is the jet stream in your life? Everyone has access to this “jet stream” we all have it. We even know where it is too. Its when we feel calm, peaceful, and we are very much disconnected from any of the turbulence around us.

We are in the Flow, in the Now, in the moment where all the resources are working together to make things easy and effortless.

Do you know where to find the turbulence in your life?

Well it’s often there in the media and news, we just can’t do anything about it. We will experience some of the results of that turbulence but really there is nothing we can do to affect it. We are passengers along for the ride, that turbulence is not in our lives, it’s over there, we can go into it, and bring it into our lives, and feel the rock and roll of turbulence from others…or…

We have a choice. Yes we do. We can resume our personal “jet stream” and resume flow, focus, attention to what we want, and let of other peoples behaviours, and aggression. That’s turbulence – and it’s drama!

Where do you find drama in your life? How do you manifest it and develop it, talk about it, expand it make it bigger, add to your story? Tell it from that place of deleting, distorting and generalizing the details.

When you find yourself in turbulence are you aware you have a choice and can do something different? With whom does this turbulence generally take place?

What can you do about it in the moment?

It’s like an accident, keep staring into it, and you just might pile into it too.

Instead, step back, become aware of the turbulence. It’s going to feel like : Have to, Must, They Should, How terrible, How upsetting, How dramatic…

And those kinds of statements are going to drive the turbulence into a frenzy. They feed turbulent behaviour. They feed turbulent beliefs, and they drop you like a stone, from the Jet Stream into rocking and rolling around, wanting the agony to stop!

When you experience the feeling of turbulence, what is your first step?

Ask yourself some questions:

Am I aware I’ve entered into the turbulence and I’m feeling the reactions to it.

Am I aware I am telling my story with greater and greater drama? Am I aware that I’m kind of enjoying this, so long as it doesn’t get any worse. When it gets worse, because turbulence does, as drama increases, turbulence does too; you find yourself reaching out for reinforcements.

Not the kind that suggests you get into the Jet Stream and stay there, if they suggest such an unsupportive option and refuse to join you in the turbulence, you often will attack them, for their ignorance about the turbulence.

Any suggestion to step into the Jet Stream can be taken as a turbulent act against your better judgement. WHAT? I’m not creating this, it’s them. Ok, then let them have the turbulence, and get back into your “jet stream” – can you do that? Will you?

Will you stop right now, assess “yes this is turbulence, and it’s so unnecessary” and choose, Jet Stream.

Remember the benefits:

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Peace

Use less fuel, Get there faster, feel relaxed and calm, a sense of peace, even serenityAs the drama fads away to the turbulence, and you are simply shifted to an entirely different place, state and awareness. Life is good. It really is.

So wait, is this not just turning our back on the important issues of the day?

No that would be more turbulence,  just turbulence, notice how it wants to bounce you around, and push everyone’s buttons, push the guild, the shame, the “you have to do something about this” buttons… to get you to leave the jet stream and come on down to the level of turbulence.  How awful is it really?

It’s just turbulence, hot air and cold air, anger, and freezing others out. Just turbulence. Just air. And the Jet Stream is a solid safe, friendly comfortable, fuel efficient way to resume normal and stay focused on what is important to you.

What do you choose in your life?

If it’s turbulence do you know how to leave it behind and get into the Jet Stream quickly, effortlessly, just like the pilots do?

If you refuse the Jet Stream ask yourself what is more important than expecting a great life, and a great ride?

You paid the same price everyone else did to get on this flight, so aren’t you entitled to the same great smooth, effortless ride?

The Jet Stream… it’s the only way to fly!

New Beginnings

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Do you ?

What do I want? I know what I don’t want… and that wasn’t good either,

So what do I really want?

When we are clear and know what we want, it’s really easy to pick off the stuff that does not work. And having some support in figuring that out often comes through “talking it through” with someone that does not have an investment in your decisions or choices. An impartial third party. As a “wise woman” once told me, “if you just let people talk long enough, they find their own answers.”

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Friends Support

Then you  will not end up going through 6 months or a year of more of the same, trying to get a different outcome, instead you see the patterns and you can easily say “no this is not what I want” and reach a better decision before you get hooked into more of the same.

And that’s the only match up you want to be going for. All the others are various levels of internal negotiation and denial to try and get what you want, and that creates massive delusions and illusions, drama and
self sacrifice, all in the hopes of eventually, maybe, hopefully getting a little of what you want.   

We spend our youth chasing , making and subjecting ourselves to lots of drama, and when we get older it seems reasonable to – live alone, and accept what little bits and pieces come along – declaring “I’m so much happier than I was when I was young”. Of course you are, you are alone and happily making choices just for you. What if there was a way to do this differently? No sacrifices and no giving up, and finding yourself living life sharing the adventure with someone that would not ask you or want you to give up anything?

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Shared times

So there are some ways to secure the shifts and changes you might be looking for, however, if you don’t know what they are… you won’t know when you get them.

And believe me knowing all this, nothing is perfect, there is no perfect relationship, however, if the majority of what you want, the big things are covered, then the little things are so easy for you to take care of.

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I trust myself

What we most want in our life is someone we can….

Trust? Respect? Like? Be-friend? Love? Care for? That will give us the same in return?
Physically attracted to, have fun with? Maybe choose to go the distance with each other?
Through the mirrors of relationship figure out what is mine to still work on? Witness my life and respect me enough to at least see me, hear me, and love me?

We can blame our parents, our teachers and keep ourselves a victim of our own choices and behaviours, and so many do. And it’s ok to do that too, it’s just a difference “choice point”.

When women figure this out – it’s wonderful, they are like honey to bees, because they just keep dancing out of the reach of the relationships that just will not work…because they know what they want.

And the right bee is out there, and when they share their honey together, it really is magic. Really.

When we ask: What am I doing? That’s when real change is possible.

To get there, we can’t just say – oh I’m over my childhood stuff with mom and dad , cleared and released. Instead we drive forward for :

Forgiven, and the free-flowing gratitude for  our parents, who held to their steadfast behaviours that caused me to “wake up” and say – “hey I want something different here”

Go Ahead: Ask the questions:

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I can do this!

“Who Am I?”
What do I want?
What would it look like?
What stops me from getting that?

What do I have to deal with in my own behaviours?
Am I 100% satisfied with myself?
Do I know how to go with the flow,
Let things go?
Relieve stress and anxiety, tension and even discharge anger ?

What do I have to do to get all this?
What steps do I take?
What books do I read?

Am I worth committing to? Am I the person I know I can be – all the time?

So, a set of goals, a bit of work, some commitments to taking this work personally…

Then what happens next is really up to you, because at the very least you will not be afraid of your personal history, you will have shifted that forever, into personal awareness so you never again find yourself stuck without resources to help yourself.

The crazy thing I found out in my self discovery process is this NLP training we do, and I took, is designed specifically to hit these targets, to create awareness and open us to our real self, perhaps the scariest aspect of knowing oneself is connecting to it all.

Some of the keys to self discovery are letting of of those crazy beliefs we’ve agreed to:

Masterfully handle family issues, with awareness of your own choice points
No longer controlled or manipulated by guilt or anger
Skillfully design and create the life you want
Orientate yourself to your goals and moving towards what you want, instead of away from, because of fear, guilt, lack of confidence in yourself
Know what your personal goals are
Set a campaign to achieve them in a timeline that is yours, then projecting and future pacing it into your future
Knowing what you want, and celebrating when you get it – celebrating the self, rather than expecting others to
Knowing the difference between sorting from the inside, to sorting from the outside – both are essential to navigating life, and experience, however, there are time, when only you and yourself know what is truly needed
Achieving milestone goals
Remaining active in creating the life you want
Adjusting what isn’t working quickly and efficiently rather than hoping things will change

Masterful personal change work starts with knowing what you want.

This is not a therapy, NLP doesn’t work like that, NLP operates somewhere much deeper on the level of knowing how we communicate with each other. How you communicate in your relationships whether business or personal relationship or even specifically to yourself,
NLP provides the tools to help you reveal your personal communication style, the way you process information, how you view the world, what your beliefs are, changing those historical markers that you used to believe created your problems. Getting real with who you are, helping yourself first, and feeling amazing about it.

NLP doesn’t hold a behaviour judgement either, it doesn’t need to. Leave that one to the therapist’s chair.
NLP steadfastly observes communications and the process we use to achieve the outcome, whether we like it or not, or even want to change something, NLP doesn’t hold an opinion on that.
It simply says “This is what you are doing to achieve this”.  Now, “is it what you want?”

Want to change it? Ok, then we use the same tools and skill sets to achieve that too.

So think about this, where are you right now? Do you know what you want? What’s important to you? How many times have you stopped yourself from getting what you want? If you speak your truth what happens? If you say “this is what I want” how do you feel about that? What if you have an opportunity before you – do you back away fearful of the challenges? Tell yourself I’m not good enough? No one will listen to me? My father said I was …. My mother always….

 

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Team Work

So what’s the point of those stories in your life? Are you ready to change them? For good?

Contact me and lets get started – after all this is Your Life.

Today is a new day…

No mistakes in it

Its just begun, and what are your thoughts?

Where are you placing your focus?

Yesterday, last week, a month ago?

Or is there fear and worry about something you must do today?

Or next week?

Or the new job, or interview today?

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Lifes’ choices

What stops you?

What behaviours do you use to keep yourself fearful and worried?

What stories do you tell yourself?

What movies are you revisiting?

What don’t you want to change?

Do you know what must change?

How do you answer all of this in your mind, right now?

You know what you know… and you know what stops you.

Lets change that

Change …

 

Change is  the only permanence we truly know. 

Nothing stays the same, everything is constantly moving, changing and shifting, like the great tides they are never the same, nor are the grains of sand the tides move.

Meditation in our daily lives can help us change the patterns and beliefs we sometimes tell ourselves are “permanent”.

IN FACT, meditation helps us observe the impermanence of everything.

If we bring our focus to something, it’s already moved, the moment of NOW is illusive, try and hold your focus in NOW… NOW…NOW…How about NOW?

It’s always moving, no two breaths are the same, no two fingerprints, we are change, we are it’s awareness and we are what marks change. We have the capacity for memory, and that gives u the awareness of change and how it moves through our lives. Have you been able to include meditation in your life? Helping you expand consciousness yes, and all the other wonderful things it brings to our personal mind and body? Meditation is a gift to ourselves that continues to give back to us, all day long.